3 years of my life gone

Graduation.

A day that i didnt expect to come.

I went to sch to meet lex and wayne who were alrd photowhor-ing.. and started to take pics with them. hahah

then it was time for our ceremony. 3 yrs. familiar faces all arnd.. memories came back just like that.

You future is a piece of white paper. Unwritten. Many people found the speech boring. but i found it inspiring. like.. VEry?

hahah.. after that was cool. more photo whor-ing with class mates.. we even too 1 with ms chan.. sandra and i..

then we went to return the gown and stuff.. in the rain. and yeah.. more updates bout each other.. then soon we were done with it and we went vivo.. thai express again.. 10% off just seem so attractive. hahah

then we went star bucks to talk and stuff.. truth or dare with zhong zi mi ma.. the usual.. alot of hidden secrets revealed.. esp like my deep dark ones . hahahah... but yeah.. maybe i don like confrontation but.. yeah.. maybe after 3 yrs should end on happy note? but yeah.. shall update to know who's getting married or who shot gun.

Hope its not me.
Alvin
Cya in 2010.

Swim or Die.

Juz came back from drinking session with wayne alex and sx.

had dinner at crystal jade. damn difficult to find the specific one out of the 4.

haH.

After that went to TCC for coffee. waited for lex.

Kaffee-tini is gay. Lambo still best drink there.

Then went to pee. and ended up at Balcony again.

Pee-ed. and started first round of drinks. screwdriver, whiskey coke. one jug each. hahah

talked rubbished and drank... then i craved for more. tried this whiskey macallan 12 or something on rocks. not bad. smooth. nice aftertaste.

but cool part i'm still here.

no slp.

NUS open house.

I'm going alone. Hang over? and yeah. have to see how i adapt now.

the talks i wanna listen to is like from 2 onwards.. slpy time? hahah. hope i don disgrace myself. haH.

aunt house after that. need to make the bruchettas and all. hope i don screw it up and burn down her kitchen. wish me luck.

Sometimes u just have to function by instinct. by pass ur brain. swim. or die.

Would u eat cardboard with me?

I have tasted wonderful food.
With wonderful people.

But i always believed the person whom shared the pleasant food memories share suffer along with me when i chew on cardboard to make ends meet.

thats when u know u have met the person u would be with for the rest of ur life.

True or not?

Only time well tell.

My rhythm is back up.

Don worry peps. i'm not emo anymore.

Just awake.

No more delusions.


-Human.

Creep.. again

Somehow i just relate to this song.. aint it just poetry?


When you were here before,
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel,
Your skin makes me cry

You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so very special

But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts,
I wanna have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When I'm not around
You're so very special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here, ohhhh, ohhhh

She's running out the door
She's running out
She run run run run...run...

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so very special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here...

I just need something to take up my time

Maybe its true.

I'm not in love with what i have desired.

But in the desires themselves.

I'm so freak bored.

Maybe i'll just try my hand at fixing that freaking oven.

Wanted to bake brownies today..

and yeah the piece of shit oven kinda showed me that it was live.

i touched the rack and it went Bzzzz. Ouch

I touched it a second time. Bzzz. ouch.

no more third. but i just found it weird that it went up to 230 yest.. something is damn wrong.

why did the bulb blow?

and did i do something wrong?

anyhow.. i think i'll check it out again. tmr

when i'm alone at home.

but don fear. i try to not get myself killed.

Yesterday Today Tomorrow

Met up with xinru yest.

After an interesting choc tasting session with aunt and mum.

Talked about alot.. had dinner.

Updates updates updates.

Somehow.. maybe its just the both of us.

or that we just arnt mainstream.

the stuff we do. the way we pursue education.

girls and all.

but yeah..

at the end of the day.. its the process and whether we get there.

I'm at an important point in my life.

I'm going into the army. I have university applications waiting for me.

But yeah.. it would all be so nice if i have someone to share it with me.

but yeah.. u cant always get what u want yeah?

So i guess. its only me and my frens here then.

hahah.. maybe i shall make a pact with myself.

Settle down only when i get there.

and theres a freaking winding road.

donno who i'll meet along the way..

but i just hope it works out fine.

My future.

Wait for me.

I Just Is.

I started my journey in pursuit of a wonderful article with meaning.

Armed with my books, a pen and a note book,

I went to find a corner where my thoughts could flow.

Nothing came out.

And then i went to meet wayne and saw people at the club.

Then it all came to me.

Inspiration do not only come to me from text.

Philosophy is about life. and thats what i write about.
-Here it goes

Change

Got reminded by Nietzsche about people.

How we are undefined. How humans just.. is.

No its not a grammer mistake. we just cant be defined by others, until we have defined ourselves.

For some.. it is the lack of change, the style or personality that defines who he or she is.

But for me. Its the ability of change that defines me.

When i was talking to a fren, i saw how someone else failed to change. after 3 whole years and the person had the same troubles as before.

And the first thing that came to my mind shocked me.

I have grown so much. changed so much that i actually think that i'm quite proud.

For the close friends who have been with me at my weakest moments. Dealing with breakdowns of emotions.. the after effects of the implosion. and that one truely scarring incident.

I survived it. I grew out of it. and i'm not the same sicko as before. Sick still no matter. But i am sure i have come a long long way.

As a person. i have learnt to put away my past and move on. Even with skills i have learnt amazing stuff. Who knew i could learn how to make chocolates? What about desserts from scratch? my culinary skills aint that good but it will grow.. at least i hope..

and yeah.. somehow.. i have done it without any specific motivating factor..

which comes to the next point.

what now? how do i change even more to get better?

i shall spell this out to everyone.

I have always been at the mercy of my emotions. temporary highs coming and going.. along with people in my life. infatuation.. crushes and all nonsensical.

explains my mood swings. but i have always thought that i wouldnt survive without periods of temporary highs.

I always believed that i needed muses to inspire to make wonderful creations, no matter if its food chocolates or even art.

I want to change that.

I want to change not because of some random girl but for myself.

I want to change and prove that its all in me. and not anyone else.

I want to change and get myself out of this vicious cycle.

I have done so much without noticing. and i didnt need any girl to get me through.

The only people i thank is my frens. Those who stood by me throught the hard times.

And those who just happen to be there.

Thank you. And i promise i'll offer much much more in the future.

No matter how far that will be.


To the future me: Never take anyone for granted. Remember to Count your blessings.

Miss me? I'm back

Hmm.. after that very inspirational turn of events...

alot of creative juice flowed in terms of food..

to the point i need to recover from loss of fluids.

hahah

welcome my objectivity back.

Delusional were similar to the euphoria of love...

but i guess.. they are called delusions for a reason.

Lets just get rid of them and get on with life ya?

Mother's day Feast

Hmm.. Wanna avoid the chaos during mothers day? Need somewhere to dine? Cook for your mum then!. hahah

okay.. it wasnt too fantastic.. something was wrong.. maybe i did too many things at once.. so the food didnt turn out as perfect as i wanted.

First.. appetizers... Baby cherry Buchetta with parsley, and mixed garden salad =)

The starters......

Up close... my salad =)

Close up of half eaten buchetta =)

Then we had the main course.. wanted a lil fusion food. Japanese Miso Risotto with Black pork chops with Buffalow Sauce..

Yeah. thats it.. quality not as cool though.. over cooked the pork.. risotto lack the OoompH. but yeah.. i guess.. the food cant be perfect every single time ya?

Happy Mothers Day!

Mday Set of 6 =)














Hmm.. What have i been up to? Here's the proof.. Made chocs for all my aunts and mums and all.. supposed to be a secret still so.. Shhhh.. hahah

A Set of 6.. Each with its own personality and taste.. so start drooling ya














Strawberry Cup Surprise!
-Valrhona Ivoire white chocolate with Strawberry Liquer
with a 55% Equitorial Dark Chocolate with Fresh strawberries Puree














Coconut Truffle
-Classic Coconut Truffle using Valrhona Ivoire White Chocolate with a Coconut Cream Ganache
(Favorite Item =)














Dark Chocolate Truffle
-65% Valrhona Manjari Dark Chocolate Ganache finished by 55% Equitorial chocolate and Valrhona Cocoa Powder














Grand Marnier Truffle
- 55% Valrhona Equitorial chocolate Ganache infused with Grand Marnier, finished using Equitorial Chocolate and Dark Chocolate Flakes














Dark Lemon Squares
-Lemon infused Ivoire White chocolate filled Squares finished with Valrhona 55%Equitorial Chocolate














Mango Yogurt Truffle
-Mango infused filling made from Mango Puree and Yogurt encased in Dark chocolate Shell.

Woah.. that was the intro.. and yeah.. Potential investors out there.. TAG ME! haahha

Chocolate Oracle

Compliments from Cedric =)

What Your Taste in Chocolate Says About You

You are sophisticated, modern, and high class. Your taste is refined, but you are not picky. You are often the first to try something new. You are driven and focused. You crave success. A total perfectionist, you hold yourself to high standards. While you life a charmed life, people feel like you are too hard on them. You love the feeling of accomplishment. You enjoy doing what's important. You feel lost when you have to do frivolous tasks or hang out with shallow people.

The Chocolate Oracle

Lunch Date with Alvin

MmmMMmm.. hahah














This Pea and Lemon Risotto combi has been something i've wanted to try for some time liao.. nicely acidic.. with a wee bit of lemon zest.. and some celery that someone realli didnt like to eat. hahah.. but i still managed to forced it down her throat. hahah

The Duka thingy.. maybe spelled wrongly as corrected by my Ma.. is damn nice and easy to use. brilliant dried herbs.. sesame.. and all.. Grilled on my New Tefa Grill pan.. Shiok. hahah.. Everyone loved it.. =)

Kinda forgot to cook rice for dinner.. so i whipped this out.. more Pork loins.. with the same Duka mix.. but i changed the risotto to Pea and Celery Sauteed in butter.. and chicken stock.. like using the remainder of my stuff.. so.. yeah.. it was nice.. and economical. =)
















Did i mention Korean Strawberries are damn gorgeous? You guys will be seeing what i did to them soon =)

















Shit happens.. Bad luck's back. But Its aint that bad ya? hahah

Quiz quiz quiz

Was darn bored.. then i went to yxian's blog.

Went to do this quiz thingy..

hmm.. so am i trying to fit the circle into the square hole?


Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.


So how was it? try it http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

The number 23

What looks like a freaky supernatural flick... but ends up with a nice philosophical finish.

The narration gave it all away in the end.. and used another medical condition for the explanation. Hypergraphia in this case.

The battle between the one's past.. and whether the bloody leopard can change its spots...

Blah blah. what stood out was the "One truely philosophical question.." of whether one should take their own life.. So Camus.. and i believe that.. cause.. Death is easy.. and too easy?

How our mind makes sense of nonsense... thats why i don believe myself.

I don believe in reality..

I don believe that everything is fixed..

I'm just fiction of my own imagination.

Hanging By a Moment

Its all different now.

Found it on linda's blog.

The significance it used to have. The one and only song that i couldnt stand during that period.

Its all over now.

its Just A Song.

Go AHEAD.. DROOL!

Yes. The Calorie King has just went for Yes.. ANOTHER chocolate course. This time for more molding and stuff.. After the previous truffle course.. this one is a belgium chocolate course..

Above.. Maschino cherries dipped in dark choc..

I like the flower one.. looks damn pro. but i kinda have to pay 100 bucks for the mold... and much much more for investment. Will get that if i go pro. hahahah like never?

Near the finish products also.. like so many rite? but the aunties were super kiasu.. so yeah.. i didnt get much. don care. GIVE THEM THE CALORIES! hahah

Finally. The Chef's tray of all creations today. From 3 types of chocolates.. a gazillion molds.. and 2 kinds of truffle shells. u can realli make alot ya? hahah

But never take granted the process of making chocs. cause i'll always remember the techniques.. how tough it is.. especially to clean up. hahahah.. a lil of the mess for u to see. hahaha

Leave u guys something nice to look at. =)